I fell in to the trap again today. I am so angry at myself. Why can't I seem to shake the tight grasp he has me? It was miserable being with him but he is so good at sucking me in, and he always has been. That's definitely the best skill on his resume and he knows it. And, I know he's a liar but part of me wants to believe his lies. I haven't looked him in the eyes for so long, not like I did today, and I thought I was going to lay right down and become a piece of the floor board underneath my feet just so he could go ahead and stomp on me again. I'm here, wait for you, so go ahead and really grind those boots in this time!
"Who do you think you are running around leaving scars catching your jar of hearts and tearing love apart..."
Why do I even question the reasons is he trying so hard to make this work as if it gives his purpose some validity. Can't he just leave me alone or do I mean so little to him like some twisted game of chess he was so bored with but just doesn't feel like walking away from now that it got interesting. He looked at me and said he misses me so much. I suddenly felt my body start dancing wildly around while he pulls this string and that string, closer to him. I was smart enough to bring a pair of scissors this time, figuratively speaking, for those pesky strings, that is.
I just want to be free. I need to be free. But both of know I'm not. Not yet, anyway.
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